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Writer's picturekidrunn3r5000

Well That Kinda Sucks



Now that everything has kind of calmed down I can write about what has gone wrong with this trip without it sounding like complaining. Where did we start again?


Oh yeah this total drama island series started back on December 21st when my friend and I were on the plane from MSP to LAX, I got anxious because on my Delta app it said our flight was going to be late arriving into LAX and the flight to Kona was in like a 15 minute window of arriving(you know how it takes forever to get off a fucking airplane...), luckily somehow the flight to Kona was delayed by an 1:45. So my friend and I waited until around the time we were supposed to board, I checked my phone and it said it was delayed by 14 hours. I'm like "This can't be right, must be a glitch in the system." Oh no it wasn't a glitch, in fact it was very real. By the way LAX has the most uncomfortable waiting seats ever, you literally can't lie down for a couple hours without waking up needing to see a chiropractor.


The flight to Kona was smooth as silk, nothing eventful happened besides my friend flirting with this one chick to find out God Himself cock blocked my friend. Getting through the cerveza bureaucracy was way smoother than last year where I was locked in a room for 10 days(Not joking). Then I find out my car didn't start and had to uber to and from Autozone(Ellison Onizuka International Airport apparently doesn't do jump starts anymore). I paid my parking bill(kinda cringe but whatever). I'm tired, plus I have a 2 and half hour drive to my place in Mountainview. As I get to my gate I noticed the chainlink is kinda of fucked up. Nothing seemed unusual, I unlocked the door to my house and noticed that some of the kitchen cabinets are wide open. I go to my bedroom, noticed that window was wide open. There was dirt on the bare mattress and that's where I panicked. I started going through the little house and immediately noticed a lot of my shit was missing.


Did it stop there? Oh no no no, you'd be very mistaken. Either a sinister stalker(this theory is a whole other story) or piece of shit meth head broke into my house, also messed with my water supply along with the cherry on top having pissed in my toilet. Let me add that hundreds of dollars of running gear wasn't stolen, to this day I still find it odd, as the batteries to my weed wacker were stolen but they left the weed wacker. There was no way my friend and I were going to stay there with my personal problems as I planned to give him an awesome time in Hawai'i.


The 6 days we spent on the Big Island were nice, showed my friend Waipi'o Valley, had him try real fruit, took him to South Point/Papakolea Beach, and ate a nice Christmas meal in Hawi. Then the day after Christmas I go for a 6 mile run to come back to my friend telling me he stepped on a sea urchin, I took his ass to the hospital. He's fine by the way and I'm like "How the fuck did this all happen?"


The next part is kind of my fault, (should've planned a little bit better but hey it somehow worked out even though it was a few bands) at this point I was like #yolo so I booked us a last minute flight to Maui right after I got done with a 7.5 mile run. Everything was pretty much smooth(renting the Mustang was easy). Then came the fucking Boogeyman called Hawaiian Lodging. All of the AirBnB's cancelled on me, what I was left for the night was this retreat resort called THE PLUMERIA. That was the most expensive night of my life. $975 later(don't get me wrong the place was nice and the service was great) but sleeping with a Buddha pic next to me on the wall was a bit freaky. Let's just say I better get this money back on PulseX.


This part I'll blame my friend because he wanted to get breakfast in Lahaina when the itinerary that day was to go Hana/Haleakala National Park. Since we didn't leave Lahaina until almost 12, there wasn't time to take the long way(as they close the gate at 5pm, I know it's stupid). So I ended up having to take the dangerous way there in a God damn convertible(I wasn't going to tell my friend that's it's one of the most dangerous roads in the country/the world), don't tell your mother if you ever decide to drive on this road she'll have a heart attack(I'm lucky to be alive because I thought back in 2017 I was going to meet Harambe and Carrie Fisher from my mom's driving). On top of this I never want to drive the Hana Highway in the dark again...


I hope you enjoyed my suffering thus far, I'll make a part two if there are any more problems in paradise. I'm grateful I'm healthy and for the most part doing well. Hopefully nothing too crazy happens the rest of this trip, thanks for reading!

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